What if instead of gilly weed Harry had showed up to the black lake challenge in muggle scuba gear like “like where’s your advanced magic now bitches? Got me a free fishing knife with this thing”
Honestly I just want an AU where Harry approached all his magical problems with muggle solutions. Nobody knows how to handle it because he’s supposed to be there learning magic but you know what, it fucking works.
Give me Harry Potter who is like fucking MacGuyver up in this shit, creating his own non-magical solutions to magical problems.
“Potter how did you get past the enchanted keys to the Sorcerer’s Stone?”
“I used a fucking net.”
“How did you get past the dragon?”
Harry shines a little red light on the wall “works on cats, why not a dragon”
“How did you get through the hedge maze?”
“Weed-b-gone, it’s like a pound. Nothing will ever grow there again”
It’s the final battle between Harry and Voldemort. The Dark Lord begins to prepare a spell to end Harry Potter’s life once and for all when….
Reblogging because this is funny and the gif is perfect.
This is how I imagine all the modern day muggleborns solve their problems, like they’re having a hard time with herbology, so they just head over to the room of requirement think “I really need a place where my damn cell phone is going to work” and the room makes it happen, then they go in, and call their gran and be like “hey can you send me like, a standard gardening kit? Thanks gran” they get it, and like all the various muggle science made things make herbology loads easier. A muggleborn kid decides they want to help Madame pomfrey in the hospital wing, and they notice she has to brew these really complex potions to help students with like, colds or allergies or whatever, they just write home and be like “hey, dad, can you send me like, 3 boxes of NyQuil and Claritin? Thanks” and then they show Madame pomfrey how the muggles fix illness.
a group of muggleborns all over the world start teaching the pure bloods at their various schools about the Internet and suddenly there are a bunch of Reddit threads called shit like r/potions and r/transfiguration where they’re all helping each other figure out how to do their homework and r/hogwartssecrets where they all start finding ways to screw with the stairs and create new secret passages and a special wizard version of ratemyprofessor pops up.
a small group of muggleborns who went home for Christmas all got those little BB-8 droids for Christmas and then used magic to make them sentient and repainted them to be unique and now there’s a bunch of witches and wizards walking around hogwarts with ball droid familiars
I suggest Harry Potter and the Methods of rationality tbh
i suggest harry potter and the methods of rationality
sat on my mother’s lap & then bit her, curled up beside Marmaduke & then bit him, accepted a kiss from Grim & then slapped her, filled the house w sharp screams at 3am bc she fall asleep downstairs & work up Alone, bellowed for food & then continued bellowing bc the brand was unsatisfactory, bellowed for play & then continued bellowing bc her toy was boring, developed an overwhelming phobia toward her new toy (it squeaks when you bite it), tore a hole in the couch & then hid inside for 3 hours to escape The New Toy, woke me up by licking my cheek repeatedly til it was raw & painful, woke me up by lying across my neck & cutting off my airflow, woke me up by starting a fight w Grim on my chest, woke me up by biting through the skin of my toes,
I rescued this tiny lizard from the dog pool yesterday and it sat in my hand for a while trying to warm up before I released it.
This is a skink! One of my favorite groups of lizards. You can tell because it has tiny legs, and a fairly tall body that’s almost square from a cross-section. Some skinks even have legs so small that they wriggle like snakes instead of walking on their legs.
When you’ve had a lot, it doesn’t change your personality. It doesn’t make you meaner or sadder. When people say they’d do things that they’d never do sober, it’s not in the sense that they’d never intend to do those things.
Aside from the buzz and brain fog, and floppy motor control, all that alcohol does is temporarily break down your walls and filters. Essentially, alcohol just inhibits your capacity for self-control. The side of you that comes out when you’ve had alcohol is not a different person, that’s why having just a bit is considered appropriate for “loosening up,” or why you might see people in fiction using excessive alcohol to extract the truth from someone keeping secrets. But who you become when you’re drunk can say a lot about you as a person. It’s not necessarily a bad thing, but realize that drinking heavily with someone else may bring up more personal subject matter; and don’t assume you’re both at that blackout point. (Alcohol also has a strong Fuck It factor the more you drink.) That’s also why, if you’re not in a good place mentally, alcohol may make you more emotionally vulnerable rather than take the edge off.
Just some words of advice from an adult who casually drinks every now and then.
Hollywood’s attempt to create morally gray characters is ultimately a failure cause all they do is try to make the audience feel empathy for violent white dudes. Which isn’t groundbreaking at all
the number one indicator that you should see a therapist is thinking “hmm, should I see a therapist?”
I want to make one thing clear that I don’t think a lot of people even realize: you don’t need to be mentally ill to see a therapist. You don’t need to have experienced serious trauma or be deeply unhappy or think your brain is Up To Something in a Major Way to benefit from therapy. If you just want help sorting through your feelings, dealing with heartbreak, or venting your fears about the future, you can talk to a therapist! It’s allowed! It’s encouraged!
Trust me, therapists don’t mind if you come in like “okay, I have some stuff I wanna talk about”.
Grim’s a sack of potatoes loosely shaped like a cat. please appreciate her
wish I could be this uninhibited
if ever you wish to summon the Squat’s raw power, draw this symbol in the dirt. upon completion you will feel 1) your body transforming into multiple loose potatoes 2) a wave of Calm & subtle contemplation
BettSplendens Tumblr Evac 