joke: loki has his hair greased down all the time because he’s a greasy boy
woke: loki has his hair greased down all the time because he’s learned since childhood that if his large electric brother thor so much as high-fives him without it being slicked back he’ll be walking around for the rest of the day with it sticking up straight in the air from static, looking like a very frightened cat
okay but the screenwriter for Thor: Ragnarok is obviously intimately aware of what it’s like to have siblings because like…the snake scene? Bickering at every opportunity? Throwing things at each other for no real reason? “You know this guy?” “I have no idea who this person is”? Smirking when your sibling does something cool because ‘nothing but respect for MY sibling’ and then turning around and punching each other in the face right afterward? Stabbing each other for fun and then going ‘oh come on you big baby, that didn’t even hurt’? The fucking ‘Get Help’ scene? Like bruh…that is some Truth in Hollywood right there
In honor of this post reaching 10K notes, I have more examples of Siblinghood Done Right in Ragnarok:
*parent leaves the area* “THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!”
“You’re just…the worst.”
*internally* bitch I am the only one that gets to kill my sibling back off!
That little conciliatory pat on the back Loki gives to Thor after Thor says “Jane and I dumped each other”
“I swear I left it right here”
*casually talking to each other about something mundane with the underlying threat of violence everpresent in both of your voices*
casual jibes and banter about the way each other dresses (“Why would I do that? I’m not a witch.” “Then why do you dress like one?”)
“YES! THAT’S WHAT THAT FEELS LIKE!”
but also the concealed worry about your sibling getting actually hurt, even though you know they’ll probably be fine
Loki’s extremely obvious eyerolling when those girls approach Thor in public and ask for a selfie
*sibling walks in while you’re trying to cause trouble and enjoy yourself* “oh shit”
Concept: Some jackass shows Bucky how to make a blog and it becomes really popular. Not because it’s the blog of James Buchanan Barnes, American Legend, War Hero, Infamous Assassin, Alleged Terrorist. Nobody even knows it’s his blog. It gets really popular because people think it’s a really great shitpost generator or something. Because Bucky is just a Weird Fucking Person and everything he posts on his fucking personal blog comes off as somewhere between dril and Jaden Smith and people are like “this is some quality garbage right here” and thus Accidental Memelord Bucky is born.
Bucky posts things like
“What is wrong with bananas. I ate a banana today and it was Wrong. America why”
“Every time I put on my eye makeup it gets bigger. My whole face is eyeliner now.”
“Why does friendship feel so much like punching”
“When I wake up in the middle of the night I am either thinking ‘who am I? does my life have meaning?’ or “did I already eat all of the plums?’”
“Why are you so grumpy” they ask me. they do not realize this is just my Face.”
“I know i said i would give my left arm for a cup of coffee but i am more awake now and i would like my arm back please”
“I guess I must have done something horrible in a past life. I mean. I definitely did something horrible in this life, so. “
OMG I LOVEEEE
YEEESSSSSSS!
“Guy in front of me won’t move his car seat up. I think that might still be upset about all those times I tried to kill him.”
“Got lectured by a guy who had been complaining about how things were Back In The Day. I don’t understand why he got upset. I too lived through the Great Depression and was drafted for the War.”
“The economy in this century sucks. Who exactly though another Stock Market crash was a good idea?”
“Apparently, it was Rude™ of me to pitch in my two cents on a conversation I happened to overhear, despite agreeing with them. On an unrelated note, I am no longer allowed in the ceiling vents.”
“‘If you don’t behave we’ll send (mutual) after you.’ Jokes on them. I’m the one who trained them to be an assassin in the first place.”
“Tried to buy a Chicken Dinner candy bar at the supermarket today. Turns out they were discontinued 54 years ago. Super bummed.”
“Wait. People were on the moon?! We got into space? There is a way off of this rock?! Why am I only just hearing about this?!”
“’Have you been living under a rock the past 50 years?’ No I was cryogenically frozen for 70. I don’t appreciate your tone young man.”
“My friend likes convincing people that I’m the Reckless one in our friendship. As if he won’t find an alley behind a bar to pick a fight in if I take my eyes off him for two seconds.”
“Why would i want to get a haircut when instead I can look like i just returned from a 12 year jaunt in the wilderness every time i grow a beard”
“was having a hard time finding noodles in the grocery store & asked a clerk for help. she looked at me like a crazy person. lady, it’s not my fault you don’t speak russian”
“what kind of idiot thinks dancers are sissies? literally every ballerina i have ever met could kill an adult man with just her legs”
“today i discovered Conditioner. the future is a miracle and my hair like a cloud now”
“apparently just jumping on to a moving bus when you are running late is not a thing people do anymore. please stop yelling at me.”
“went to a club last night to see what the hip kids were into. apparently the latest thing is just having sex standing up with your clothes on in a room full of people.”
“on the one hand, people dressed much nicer in the 40s. on the other hand, yoga pants.”
“rode in a car with heated seats today. it is my house now. i live here.”
“i have acquired a small bear. i am putting a collar and leash on him. he is my dog. no one tell animal control”
“i am working on this whole Good Guy thing but anyone who cuts me in line at starbucks deserves to have their kneecaps shot out okay”
“why did they have to make escalators so terrifying to get on and off of? from now on I’m just jumping off the mall balconies. none of this awful moving teeth staircase”
“i don’t care if it’s a ‘priceless historical artifact,’ punk, i didn’t wanna do the dishes and it makes a pretty good spaghetti bowl”
“hoodie pockets are so great. i can fit like three sandwiches and a grenade in there and my hands are still warm”
“i really though we would have flying cars by now. the future is such a letdown.”
“changed sam’s ringtone to jesus take the wheel.”
“do you know that feeling when you go to lean on your short friend’s conveniently arm-rest-height shoulder but you forget they had a huge growth spurt and you just awkwardly lean your elbow into the middle of their bicep”
“i swear i didn’t know your girlfriend was coming over. i always ominously clean my assault weapons on the coffee table like that. it had nothing to do with you.”
I say: I want the Tony ships in one chart explained
They say: nobody can do it the world is not ready
I say: watch me
starkquill isnt on here but please let me recommend: chaotic stupid
They say: Starkquill isn’t on the chart
I say: Watch this.
And now they ask: But where would Tony/Vision fall?
I said: here.
They say: this is Rhodey erasure!
I say: I am really glad that you noticed that Rhodey isn’t there, because nobody really seems to complain in fanart or fanfics either. I did it on purpose to see how many of you care, and I see now, that you do. So please spread the word and put. More. Rhodey. In. Fanfics. And. Fanarts. Just simply make him a complete valid part in the fandom like Steve or Bucky or Thor.
i loved this bit because it was obviously taika waititi making commentary on the conjunction of valkyries, amazons, and dora milaje in this year’s movies. 😀
i love this bit because the valkyrie preceeded thors birth by centuries and he gives a thumbs up after ‘about time’ like he absolutely knows he just said something dumb as hell but is stuck with it now
“said something dumb as hell but is stuck with it now“ = thor in a nutshell
I genuinely feel this is something M’Baku would be aware of and concerned about. He’s just that dude. Pranks, but not the triggering kind, keep it cool.
so i saw some people discussing how loki in ragnarok shouldn’t have been at all phased or subverted by dr. strange – which i agree with, but also, hey, it’s comedic and you can argue that he was taken off-guard, but upon re-watch, something stuck out to me –
there’s this moment when they appear at the bottom of the stairs and thor rolls down the last couple and stands up and he says
we could’ve just walked.
and it made me think of how magic works in terry pratchett’s novels, how (to paraphrase) the hard part wasn’t turning someone into a frog, it was not turning someone into a frog when you knew how easy it was.
like, the whole scene with dr. strange is just. all magic. all pointless magic. unnecessary magic, when, well. they could have just walked.
whereas loki doesn’t really rely on magic overmuch in the movie – he uses it as a tool, when he needs it, but if the job can be done with plain old non-magical trickery or a knife, he just uses those. he resorts to magic when he’s cornered by valkyrie, he uses it when his goals are most directly accomplished by using magic rather than by other means.
whereas dr. strange is using magic all over his scene, just to use it. just because he can. magic was unnecessary for ninety percent of what he did in that scene, the only time he needed magic was to whisk them away to norway. but he teleported all over the place even when he only needed to move a few feet, gave thor an ever-refilling beer that just spilled everywhere, floated around to make a show of how ~magical~ he was, when…
he could have just walked.
i mean, i’m very sure that the filmmakers intended it for comedic effect, but there’s also a layer there of dr. strange being much less comfortable with magic than loki is – loki doesn’t need to bust out the magic at every opportunity, it’s simply a skill, a tool that is completely under his control and at his disposal. whereas dr. strange (at least in his scene in ragnarok) is showing off, which reeks of insecurity.
i guess i’m thinking… if you take the magic away, loki is still a deadly, formidable opponent with many tricks up his sleeve, but dr. strange is just a guy in a cape.
this is good and true because in the comics loki and dr strange got in a fight in a parking lot and then both of them had their magic taken away so loki just punched stephen through a wall and called it a gay ass day
in fairness most days for Loki are gay ass days regardless of how many wizards he punches
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