The Redback would like you too! They love humans and human homes, and seem to preferentially prefer living around us. Their venom causes almost pure pain and they are happy to share it. Here’s a picture of one eating a lizard.
Perhaps you’d like the Sydney Funnel-Web Spider instead? A spider that more or less is restricted to our largest, most populous city and can kill you. It likes to dig holes in your garden.
Perhaps reptiles are more your style? Consider our Tiger Snake, which is not a peaceful soul content to be left alone. Tigers have attitude and will have a go when provoked, unlike the relatively chill red bellied black snakes.
Also around our homes we also have the notorious Magpie, aka murder bird, which is not really as bad as the internet makes them out to be unless you’ve bothered them previously, but they can do significant damage divebombing your skull if they decide to.
Like birds? The cassowary probably should be a cryptid, but this dinosaur who didn’t get the message really exists, and will trample your organs. It eats fruit.
On the topic of large herbivores, red kangaroos are as big as ours come. They will eviscerate dogs and humans that get too close, and will total a car in a crash. Do not approach a red kangaroo hit by your car unless you are sure it’s dead.
If you’re interested in something a little more legendary, we have the Razorback pigs. These are not cryptids, they are large enough up north to start eating cattle.
But of course, they’re not the biggest snout at the dinner table.
And I haven’t even talked about what’s in the water.
Man, skunks aren’t even dangerous! They’re just unpleasant to piss off. Usually the only time you smell one is if it’s been hit on the road. If you meet a skunk, just be chill and keep going on your way, it’ll probably do the same thing.
Rabies is scary as Fuck, but we can fix someone who’s been bitten by a rabid animal with rabies vaccines. We cannot fix someone who was bitten by most of the above with, well, anything.
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