Tag: language

weeniebagel:

weeniebagel:

foreign accent syndrome is a thing and its so fucked up

imagine growing up in central kentucky living on a dairy farm all your life never leaving the state and sounding like foghorn leghorn and one day a cow knocks your head the right way and suddenly youre speaking the queens english and theres nothing you can do about it

justicemode:

squigglytext-blog:

shipvicturi:

So, I have an American friend named Jane who married this English guy about 7 years ago. They live in Sussex together (god rest their souls), and they had a little boy pretty much right after they got married. As he grew up, they figured he would have a mix of their accents with a heavy lean towards English (because he’d go to school with English kids and teachers and the like.)

That’s not how it fucking worked out at all though. Instead, he says individual words with either an American or an English accent. Like, one second he’ll be like, “Daddy, I’m knackered” and the next he’ll be like, “AY YO MA WHERE YOU AT???” Every time they send me a video I just fucking piss myself listening to this kid.

Ok so this is a very good example of what we call “code switching” in sociolinguistics. Without going into to too detail, this comes in a few kind of flavors. The most commonly talked about kind is the ones you see in bilingual kids and adults, where they switch languages (sometimes mid coversation!) Depending on who they are talking to or what about.

That kind is also interesting, but in this case we have a child who is budialectal. First, let me dispel a myth. Kids are VERY GOOD at learning languages when they are little. Learning two languages at once will not slow them down noticeably or cause any other issues. The same is true for dialects (or varieties, as we call them in sociolingusitcs).

Think of African American children. They are suuuuper amazing, because more than likely they acquire AAVE (African American Vernacular English) at home, and then are always told they can’t use it in school, where they are taught whatever “standard American English” is (it doesn’t reeeallly exist, but meh). And they switch between the two all the time!

Anyway, if a child is receiving input from one parent in one dialect, and a different input from they other, just like they would acquire two languages, they acquire two dialects. And they employ them depending on a bunch of factors! Who they are talking to, what about, etc!

You won’t hear a ‘blend’ because the dialects are two separate systems stored in two different grammars! And they will sound native in either!

-neighborhood linguist

I think one of my favorite things about this site is when an op goes “here’s a funny anecdote” and then suddenly the neighborhood subject matter expert shows up and explains what’s behind. Learn so much here.

dospunk:

cleanertheseus:

gingerblivet:

bending-sickle:

eatingcroutons:

like-moonlight-through-the-pines:

serethiel-is-hufflepuffed:

elvenherbivore:

writingcyan:

lunestael:

sapphicpunk:

you-had-me-at-e-flat-major:

chopin-demonium:

kalmobotti:

shrineart:

space-transgressor:

spanishskulduggery:

lalexicographe:

whosaprettypolyglot:

lingasms:

commandervimes:

lingasms:

i say we start a meme where we take jokes that don’t work in other languages and translate them without explanation maybe only tagging with the original language and confuse the heck out of everyone on tumblr who’s not in on the meme like

in italian we say “prince light blue” (prince azzurro) instead of “prince charming” and i just saw a joke that in english would be “if you can’t find your prince charming, the solution is to take a random dude from the street and paint him”

what’s the difference between a stapler and a sewing machine? a stapler staples and a sewing machine doesn’t

i take it back, these are still funny in a completely different way

#what does the king of the spiders do? he reigns#I forget how to say it in French but it’s still my favourite joke

this was one of mine omg it’s one of my favourite ones i’ve ever made ever

What’s the strongest cake in the world? Mike Cake.

What do you call a fish that’s a thief? A sea bass.

What’s the difference between a cow and sheet metal ? None, both of them have milk

I don’t even care if don’t know what the joke is these are hilarious.

Boy pig said to the girl pig: “Let’s suffer.”

What happens when the sheep come to the grass field? Strawberry.

What do you call a cybercriminal cow? Minced meat.

what does leonardo dicaprio eat?

leonardo eats sandwiches 

whats a melon you cannot eat?

an idiot

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, twenty. What comes after twenty? Police.

You can’t piano a piano, but you can lean on an elephant.

What’s a pale mammoth? Helmut

Oh this is absolutely amazing!!

‘A fallow deer to another fallow deer:
– let’s play hide and seek
– please, no

What type of bread can’t be eaten? Propane.

What does a bee do at the gym? Zumba.

When is the best time to eat seafood? Wednesday.

What do an orange & an elehpant have in common? They both peel;. 

These all sound like those jokes 4 year olds make up before they fully grasp the concept of a joke

When insults had class

simonalkenmayer:

dutchfruitjar:

These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.

A member of Parliament to Disraeli:
“Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease”. “That depends, Sir,“ said Disraeli, “whether I embrace your policies or your mistress.”

“He had delusions of adequacy.” – Walter Kerr

“He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.”- Winston Churchill

“I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great
pleasure.” -Clarence Darrow

“He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.” – William Faulkner
(about Ernest Hemingway).

“Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I’ll waste no time reading it.” – Moses Hadas

“I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.” – Mark Twain

“He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends..” – Oscar
Wilde

“I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a
friend…. if you have one.”
(George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill)
“Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second  …. if there is
one.“  (Winston Churchill, in response.)

“I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here.” –
Stephen Bishop

“He is a self-made man and worships his creator.” – John Bright

“I’ve just learned about his illness. Let’s hope it’s nothing trivial.” –
Irvin S. Cobb

“He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others.” –
Samuel Johnson

“He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.” – Paul Keating

“In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily.” –
Charles, Count Talleyrand

“He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.” – Forrest Tucker

“Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?” -Mark Twain

“His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.” – Mae West

“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.” – Oscar Wilde

“He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts… for support rather than illumination.”
Andrew Lang (1844-1912)

“He has Van Gogh’s ear for music.” – Billy Wilder

“I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.” Groucho Marx

All excellent insults.

bowtochris:

chromalogue:

runtime-err0r:

itsvondell:

you can take one man’s trash to another man’s treasure but you can’t make it drink

Fun fact: the blending of idioms or cliches is called a malaphor.

My personal favorite is “We’ll burn that bridge when we get to it.”

I’m rather fond of “It’s not rocket surgery” and “not the sharpest egg in the attic,” but my all-time favourite is, “…until the cows freeze over.”

You’ve opened this can of worms, now lie in it,