Reasons why American Ninja Warrior is 100% Good and Pure

madlori:

  • Awesome outfits
  • No fighting involved, despite the name
  • Everybody cheers for everybody
  • Men and women compete on the same course on equal footing
  • Even the best competitors fail, and take it in stride
  • “Akbar Gbaja-Biamila” rolls off the tongue in a pleasant way
  • You’re only competing against the course and yourself
  • SUPER FUN OBSTACLES
  • Holy shit how are these people doing any of this
  • The way Matt Iseman says “A-MER-i-can NINjaaaa WAAAAARrior.”
  • When you wipe out the worst that happens is you get wet
  • Adorable parents, kids and SOs in matching t-shirts on the sidelines, cheering
  • Many ripped and bare-chested men
  • Many ripped and goddess-like women
  • Badass competitors with day jobs like weatherman, flight attendant, and FedEx delivery driver
  • All the other athletes are SUPER PSYCHED when someone does awesomely
  • Kids with sparkly signs in the bleachers
  • The hosts shouting semi-incoherently when someone’s Killing It on the course
  • Successful competitors using their notoriety to start up foundations and help kids
  • So many long-haired hippie rock climbing types
  • Akbar’s infinite well of Dad Jokes
  • People who DIY up Ninja obstacle courses in their backyards or gyms
  • Only one sponsor, and they just want you to drink some pomegranate juice