I love animals that are, like, the opposite of cryptids: we know for a fact they exist and have a clear idea of what they look like because we have photographs and individual specimens, but we haven’t the faintest idea where they’re coming from – they just keep showing up out of nowhere, and the locations of their actual population centres are a complete mystery.
I so want examples. anyone who knows of any should post them in notes
You know, like giant squid and such. We know the bastards exist, we have credible first-hand accounts stretching back thousands of years and dead specimens washed up on shore and such, but in centuries of searching we’ve managed exactly one well-documented encounter with a giant squid in its natural habitat. We have no idea what their native range is or what their life-cycle looks like, let alone how many of them are out there.
Are there any reverse-cryptids that /aren’t/ at the bottom of the ocean?
The red-crested tree rat, for one. There have been only three well-documented encounters since 1898, and they just plain disappeared from the zoological record for over a century. The only reason we know they’re not extinct is that one walked right up to a couple of wildlife research interns at a Columbian nature reserve back in 2011, apparently out of pure curiosity, and allowed itself to be photographed and observed for several minutes before disappearing again.
That’s genuinely pretty cool and all, but I absolutely need to talk about how the picture in that Wikipedia article looks like a tiny eldritch horror disguising itself as a peach.
To be fair, based on the actual photos from the 2011 encounter, they really do look like that:
Mattel: Barbie has had numerous careers over the years
Me: but not…. Assassin
barbies definitely been an asassin. she just doesnt tell people so she can keep her friends safe
what kind of profession allows and demand the changing to multiple careers?
barbie have always been an assassin, all other jobs were just cover and disguises
Y’all are right. It explains why Jem and Bratz are dead.
you know it might be because barbie is A TOY MEANT FOR KIDS so i’m pretty sure an assassin barbie wouldn’t be very smart but hey that’s just how i feel about it idk.
there’s a lot of things that isn’t smart in this post
You clearly have no idea how children play with dolls.
my headcanon here is that legolas is just BARELY visibly holding it together
since canon tells us that mirkwood elves like to party and are fully capable of passing out from drunk
so legolas is using EVERYTHING HE HAS to fuck with gimli and pretend he hasn’t a clue what it’s like to be affected by alcohol
while inside he’s all ‘sdkla;hgsj you can do this leggles you can do this’
‘don’t think about that time you blacked out from dorwinion wine while naked in the middle of an impromptu archery contest’
‘and all your friends drew orc penises on your face’
‘and when you woke up you were halfway to dale without a clue as to how you got there’
‘And especially don’t think about that time you drank so much that the dwarves you were supposed to be watching escaped in the empty barrels of wine.’
‘Dad never let me hear the end of that one’
Leggles
While all of the above is great, I’d like to offer that dwaven ‘ale’ probably isn’t made from barley. they live underground. what grows underground? Mushrooms. I’m saying Dwarven Ale is halucinogenic. I’m saying Legolas was tripping balls.
Janitors are magic and you should be nice to them:
– they have ALL THE KEYS – they are in the building when no one else is, a liminal space – they clean everything and cleaning is important – they know about all the little broom closets – also janitors are people and you should at least say hello
Blackspark spends a fairly considerable amount of his time around other people trying very hard not to start petting audial fins. He really likes audial fins. It’s not a kink, it’s just that “ooh pretty I want to touch” sort of thing. He will happily work it into sexy times if requested, but mostly he just wants to stroke.
Gravescratch, when sufficiently excited while in alt mode, will do a canine playbow at someone, yap, spin around, and run off to do whatever he was doing. He very rarely lets himself go like that, he loathes being seen as an animal, but people like Blackspark understand that mannerisms don’t make him an animal. He’ll be downright goofy around Blackspark when in the right mood, whining and pawing and wagging his tail like crazy.
Sharpshot’s primary optic assembly is slightly looser than usual due to being able to extend out into the main structure of his scope. It can, under unfortunate situations, get grit in between the large lenses. His response to this is extreme distress, understandably, and extending the optic structure to get it cleaned out whenever he’s in somewhere safe. It’s an incredibly strange look, his optic lenses telescope outwards into thin air and a gush of trapped optic lubricant drips down his face, but it works to get it cleaned out. Can’t have grit rubbing around in there when the lenses shift, of course.
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