Meet Calumma uetzi, one of three new species of chameleons we described in The Zoological Journal of the Linnean Society today! Is it the most beautiful chameleon species? Well, you’ll have to decide for yourself. But certainly it has an impressive
Here, a male is giving a female the full colourshow, and she is not. having it.
You can read a little more about the new species and request the PDF here!
– urgently marched into A&E and said ‘we’re having knee pain!!’ to the confused receptionist. i had to explain that it was only my knee and that he was just worried
– when asked to tag me in a meme of ‘what water are you?’, said ‘you are the ocean: home to all friends’
– loved ‘filthy gorgeous’ and, rather than learning the words, learned ‘all three parts in the song where they ring a triangle’
– after we had an argument about him not ‘getting’ my ADHD, i caught him halfway through a three hour playlist of lectures on ADHD, with a pen in hand, taking notes
– he suffered a TBI last summer and he did not like the orienting questions they ask (’what year is it? what day is it?’ etc). when asked ‘do you know where you are?’, he cracked one eye open and angrily said ‘in bed!’
– he played knack 2 and hated it. when i asked why he was still playing it, he said ‘so i never have to play it again’. he got every achievement and as soon as he got the last one he stood up, ejected the disc and returned it to the store
– lately he’s given up on making lunch so he just drinks huel which is a meal replacement shake, except huel is kind of boring so he sometimes puts nesquick strawberry powder in there
– my favourite drink is pepsi max. when asked about his dreams for the future, they often involve ‘being rich enough to find a way to pump pepsi max directly into our house’
– one time in our first year of dating i hadn’t seen him in weeks, whereas we normally saw each other all day every day, so i was gonna go stay with him for a couple days. he had a temporary job (i’m talking 2 weeks total) at the time and i was bummed that i was gonna be alone at his for a bit, but w/e. he was texting me like ‘work is going okay, in the line for the canteen right now’ while i got on the bus. i found the key where he said it was, i found a note on the table like ‘hi love! the wifi code is [password], I’ll be back at 5!’, and then I went into the lounge and he was there. he was lying on a fold-out bed with Marvin Gaye playing. the TV was on a powerpoint slide that said ‘Welcome, Jess. I quit my job.’ he was entirely naked except for a cushion with the letter ‘D’ over his crotch. im 95% sure there were candles
– we play the game Rimworld, where you micromanage a colony of people on an alien planet. he uses it entirely to simulate a peaceful colony, mostly of women, who have a large number of animals they care for and train. one time he got this random event where all the women in the colony got a psychic mood boost and he was like ‘honestly that’s my life goal’
– when he was in hospital and his cognitive functions were slowly coming back, he looked up from twitter with horror and said ‘jess… is the american president a racist?’
– we were playing Articulate, which is a game where you have to describe a word without saying the word itself. His partner said ‘when you’re beginning sex, you are…’. he, without a second of hesitation, yelled ‘FOREPLAY’. the answer was actually ‘initiating’, but my ego grew like fourteen times
– one time he asked me what guacamole was, and i told him, and he said ‘if it’s made up of things that already have names why does it have a different name?’ i have not let him live this down yet
– i used to have an eating disorder, and whilst i’m good 99.9% of the time now i occasionally do have wobbles. one time i’d eaten some mini-donuts and i told him ‘i kind of want to check the calories on those…’, so he immediately pulled the label off and ate it
– i lost him for like twenty minutes at a uni event, and when i found him he presented me with a pepsi max badge and said ‘i rode this mechanical bull to try and win you a year’s supply but i fell off pretty quickly. sorry.’
– we won the ‘best couple’ award in our year at uni, but neither of us were there to collect it because i was ill and he left halfway through to come home and take care of me
– one time he wasn’t paying attention while making lunch and he cracked an egg directly into the bin. the look of confusion on his face was priceless.
– on the rare occasions when i wake up before him, when i kiss him/ touch him he makes these little like… activation sounds? you know like when you touch a cat? it’s like those
That’s pretty terrible photoshop, and I’m pretty sure an elephant would pick up the lioness instead, only to throw her about 50 yards.
illusionists busking illegally, shimmering lights disintegrating as they run
plant mages tending tiny rooftop and windowbox gardens
elementary school kids learning basic sigils on the playground
wixen taking a while to key into the magic in new cities when they move
alchemists dealing on the side to support their experiments
middle schoolers making friendship talismans and amulets for everyone
numerologists who’ll do your math homework for $5 or divine your fortune for $10
kids mass-texting luck and speed spells when their parties get broken up by the cops
Hell yeah, let’s talk about magic.
Like elementary kids learning silly (or inappropriate) charms from each other on the bus, the same way we learned our first swear words. Clapping games across the bus aisle, but with spells instead of rhymes.
Worrying that your friend is getting into dark magic, but not knowing how to talk to them about it. Intervention programs for kids abusing hexes and runes, because magic has given them control over something for once in their life, and they’re starting to make some dangerous choices.
Psychic teachers knowing when you’re cheating. Knowing when you’re having trouble with homework. Or at home. Knowing when you need tutoring or an AP course because you’re just not being challenged or a different teaching method because you can’t process what you’re learning in class no matter how hard you try, and the teacher tells you it’s okay, they know. They know.
Magic graffiti. Graffiti in wild places, and graffiti that vanishes when certain people roll by like the police. Or graffiti that only appears when the police walk by to insult them. Murals. Swirling, living murals on the sides of buildings. Murals that—if you listen closely—can be heard, not just seen.
In the evenings, kids hiding out in someone’s backyard or an alley passing around a joint and casting minor illusions to watch while high.
Chalk artists making works that are so realistic, they come to life off of the sidewalk.
One man bands in the park, with instruments floating around playing themselves.
Punk concerts in empty lots with amped out music and lights, but noise-cancelling spells and illusion hide them in plain sight from anyone outside of the lot.
Mediums predicting people in need, and making sure to be there at just the right moment to lend them a helping hand. “You seem upset, do you need to talk?” “Oh, you’re a dollar short? No, don’t put the milk back; I’ll cover you.” “You really ought to try taking your resume to this store. Trust me.”
Necromancers in forensics speaking with the dead to solve homicides and cold cases. Living lie detectors as beat cops and detectives and DEA agents.
Strangely cheap five star food diners that bake actual love into their apple pie, and they always know your dietary restrictions without being told.
Service golems in various sizes and shapes, making sure their magic users aren’t crowded, get medical attention, go where they need to, etc. They don’t get distracted, they can be hollow to hold things like medications, and in rare instances, they seem to develop loving attachment to their users despite not being alive.
Little old landladies who dabble in witchcraft brewing homeopathic remedies for people in their apartment complex.
Street magic is an amazing concept.
Heck yes.
Cars with paintjobs covered in sigils, protecting them and others from harm.
Churches that are literal sanctuary, backed up with wards to prevent violence being done within their walls.
Practitioners of Sympathetic Magic using company logos to invoke the associated concepts – a nike tattoo makes you faster, something stamped with “Nokia” is more durable.
The old leylines don’t work, but the highways, train lines, water mains and high-tension cables do the trick.
Magic Conventions.
just. Magic Conventions.
All of this please.
There’s one street where magic doesn’t work right and everyone avoids it because “something happened there” no one knows what but you know you don’t go down that street.
If you were born there the city knows you. You find shops you’re looking for more easily, doors appear where they weren’t before and lead you right where you need. To be known by the city is a blessing.
Hospitals are places CHARGED with energy. So much happens in them they become living leylines. Often they realize they don’t need machines anymore, the rooms monitor the patients just as well. Nurses will get a feeling something is wrong with a certain room and arrive right before a patient codes so that they can help as soon as possible.
An old woman in the park feeding pixies instead of pigeons.
A woman who takes in imps and other injured magical creatures instead of cats.
In 1996, UNESCO designated the Belize Barrier Reef Reserve System a World Heritage Site, with the former British colony responsible for protection. It’s a mandate that the country has at times struggled with. By 2009, the site was on UNESCO’s “danger” list, with the organization saying that the country needed to enact better management and safeguards. But since that low point, Belize has worked to turn things around. And ocean conservation observers say there has been impressive progress. Hence the helicopter flight, which was a victory lap of sorts.
Just this December, Belize became the first country in the world to put a moratorium on all offshore oil exploration and drilling. Oceana had arranged the helicopter to help give politicians a sense of what they had protected, and what still needs to be done. “I’m really looking forward to getting off the endangered list,” Chanona said.
A black grouper patrols a coral garden in Belize. The country is taking new steps to protect this fragile resource for the future. PHOTOGRAPH BY BRIAN J. SKERRY, NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC CREATIVE
if you click to open this thread you die in real life
predicted answer: “have sex with me”
I read this thread and it’s surprisingly wholesome. Lots of guys either wanting to be the little spoon, making jokes about blanket hogging, or wanting their girlfriends to say what they like so that they can pleasure them more.
Tbh I’m starting to think most of tumblr seriously lack any serious interaction with men, and not only sexual but to a platonic/friendship level.
I don’t mean to attack anyone but how come all this people decided men would think something pervert and rapey? How come people who actually checked were so surprised that men wanted something humanly acceptable and maybe even *gasps* cute?
I am serious in this question: did you ever had male friends? Because this thread to me was the LEAST surprising thing on earth.
In HS, having been a butch lesbian and having had a ton of male friends, the typical sex questions were “hey, can you tell me how to mae her feel good?” or “hey, how do I tell if she likes it?” or “do I sound clingy/pathetic if I want cuddles after?”. Boyfriends worry about their girlfriends pleasure, their happiness and what they think of sex. They do. And when they don’t do much to pleasure them, most of the time is because they are inexperienced. Women do have a problem with communicating their desire, nobody denies that it’s also society’s fault but if you don’t ask stuff you can’t get surprised you don’t get it and out there it’s full of men wanting to do things with respect and to make their girlfriends happy.
Boys are WHOLESOME. As girls are. People are wholesome and nice and vulnerable and in strive for good things for them and others.
And even those who made sexual comments like “blowjobs” or “more boob stuff”…. why is it bad? It’s a NSFW thread???? It’s the space to talk about that. Would you have the same reaction if in their matching thread women said they want their boyfriends to go down on them more? Or if they said they’d like him to touch them in different zones? Would you have complained if women said it of their girlfriends? Then why shaming boys?
Having needs both sexual and emotional is natural, the important is not force them on people who don’t feel like that and these men didn’t (which is why the thread exists in first place).
Men have emotional needs too and pretending they don’t and buying into the “all men think about is sex” and “ah men are all rapey and dirty” is sexism, not only towards men but because it implies that women are purer than them which leads to the HolyMary kinda misoginy that denies women their need to physical pleasure.
Also let’s stop pretending sex is inherently dirty and bad. Sex is fun, as long as it’s consensual.
But yeah I agree with op, I did die opening it, OUT OF THE CUTENESS THAT SPILLED FROM IT.
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