ok, i’m built like a noble ox. like i am 6′1 and i am sturdy lady. like thighs for days. if you try to move me. you will be moved. body images aside (lol, i am self conscious about my size, yeah it’s life)

so like, i am very used to girls standing next to me in public places. i end up acquiring a pack of ladies. just because women are like, that lady is a lady men stay away from. i am jerk kryptonite (usually, i get my fair share of creeps, such is life) but most men have self preservation that this 6′1 ox will break them. and i will

so usually i am in my own phone and look up to another lady standing next to me. and i will immediately look up and make eye contact and nod. like, you know, that nod. i see you and you can talk if there is something wrong. i end up on a reg basis being a defacto bodyguard to these young ladies and small women while waiting for buses and in the metro.

i am a large oak tree. i protect the other birds.

ladies, we all got roles. find tree in the wild. we’re always happy to provide shelter from the creeps.

i’ve regularly said, “move on, she doesn’t want to be your friend”

Why does the “cockeye” squid have a teeny tiny eye, and a giant green eye?

molluscfacts:

I’m so glad someone asked this – the cockeyed squid is one of my favourite molluscs for this exact reason. Here’s what they look like, for those who don’t know:

Cockeyed squid is actually a genus (Histioteuthis) that comprises quite a few species, including the one pictured above which is known by the adorable name, strawberry squid (Histioteuthis heteropsis), but they all have the famous odd-sized eyes – something that’s not seen in any other bilaterally symmetrical animal.

The reason for this is each of their eyes is adapted for a different type of vision. Cockeyed squid live in the mesoplegaic (or twilight) zone where sunlight is almost non-existent, and they generally float like in the picture above, with their large left eye facing slightly upwards, and their smaller right eye facing downwards.

The role of the fairly normal-looking right eye is to pick up up the bright bioluminescence of creatures in the dark below them. Their left eye, however, is specially adapted to break the counter-illumination of creatures swimming above them. Counter-illumination is a strategy adopted by many creatures in the deep sea, where they illuminate the underside of their bodies just enough to “counter” their silhouette made by the small amount sunlight coming from above. The squid’s large eye sees past this as it is very sensitive to light, and the greenish-yellow lens helps to filter out the sunlight, making the creatures stand out.

This article from MBARI goes into a bit more depth

Also, here’s a good video showing how they swim:

theveryworstthing:

lobster maiden.

a mermay leftover from patreon.

black-charm:

avatarmerida:

lovinghome:

octopus kites [src]

I almost peed myself omg

That’s fucking creepy dude

sataniasblog:

vongolacielo:

writeroost:

…. I don’t fear God, but I do fear the automatic stapler in the staff room

“fuck”

That small but heartfelt “fuck” brings this whole video together.

tacticalpineapple:

theajesaysashe:

itsvegetasamahoe:

The Amazing world of Gumball writers have been unleashed

AND THAT IS THE TEA

THE WAY THEY ALL DO THAT SUCK IN A BREATH THROUGH THE TEETH AND UNFORTUNATE MMM SOUND THE WAY WE DO I’M DYING

glumshoe:

I just saw a ~10 year old put his hat on sideways, strike a pose, and say, “Hello, fellow kids!”

saulaie:

Harry Potter and the Bisexual Awakening – Part One of Three

A very slight adjustment to That Scene featuring a smol grumpy Harry and a tol, very helpful Cedric.

(And a dodgy use of the dialogue from the movie mostly, too)

Tired of losing your favorite buttons?

lastxleviathan:

tenaflyviper:

I just stumbled upon this awesome post showing a way to keep pinback buttons from falling off of your backpack/purse/etc. using safety pins.

However, it reminded me of another method that I’ve used since high school, and continue to use to this day: Rubber earring backs.

You know…these things:

I had originally bought a package of them to keep my nose stud from falling out while I slept (it was the “screw” type), but then after losing a button off of my high school backpack, I stumbled upon an even better use for them.

If you place them on the pinback of the button, just ahead of where it closes, the pins can’t slip off.

It doesn’t matter what size or shape the button is. Also, I happened to find one that wasn’t closed when I went to take pictures:

The earring back basically acts as a rubber stopper. They’re made specifically to NOT slide off in order to keep earrings in place, so they work just as well keeping buttons in place, even if the buttons aren’t closed.

Considering the backpack that I had in high school…

…I can tell you with complete certainty that rubber earring backs are, bar none, THE best method of making sure you never lose another button ever again. Also, they’re cheaper than safety pins (which can also pop open, thus allowing the button to slide off) and you won’t have to poke extra holes in whatever you’re putting buttons on.

Or hell, combine the rubber earring backs WITH the safety pins! Your buttons will be COMPLETELY UNLOSE-ABLE!

Oh dear gods THANK YOU