if i had to get in a fistfight with any member of the fellowship it would be Frodo because i would easily win
all i am saying is that he would ostensibly be the easiest one to take on in a fight given that he’s like three feet tall and has led a life of (physical) leisure compared to all of the others due to his standing as a gentlehobbit
legolas, aragorn, and gimli are all used to combat, sam works as a gardener, merry and pippin often gallivant off and get into mischief so they have the advantage of experience in whatever it is they’ve gotten up to/would possibly fight dirty, gandalf is gandalf so while weapons are out of the question i suppose that depends on if magic is involved. i don’t think i could take him without magic even if he IS old because he’s a very large guy, but maybe
it would be my knuckles against Frodo’s baby soft poet hands, plus i’ve got the additional height and fighting experience. i just think that he would be the easiest to win against in hand-to-hand combat out of the rest of them. also he isn’t real so he can’t offer a rebuttal to my claim
you’re absolutely correct BUT wanting to fight Frodo makes you a monster D:
this has nothing to do with WANTING to fight Frodo, i just think he would be easiest for me to beat in a fight with no weapons. unless he utilized his very large feet, but i think he’s too polite to do that because it’s a fist fight and that would be considered playing dirty
for someone who doesn’t want to fight Frodo you sure have put a lot of thought into fighting Frodo……….
OP is wrong though: you fight Pippin.
First off, Pippin has it coming, so you won’t be fighting your conscience at the same time.
Secondly, Pippin is a spoiled rich kid. He’s no less gentry than Frodo is, but Frodo works out and is shown to have better stamina, at least at the outset. Pippin is also both the stupidest and the slowest of the hobbits. They both nearly beat one (1) troll, so that’s comparable, but Pippin appears not to have got a single hit in against the orcs that captured them while Merry was cutting off hands like a boss. Pippin also straight-up tell Bergil that he’s not a fighter.
Also there’s a nonzero chance that Frodo will just straight up curse you (if the guilt of fighting Frodo isn’t enough if a curse by itself).
And, of course, if you try to fight Frodo, you will 100% end up fighting Sam, and he will wreck you (and you’ll deserve it, you monster)
Also: if you fight Frodo you’ll have a very angry Sam & possibly also the entire Fellowship to deal with BUT if you fight Pippin they will probably cheer you on.
Bold of you to assume one could attempt to fight Pippin and NOT instantly be killed by Boromir.
So here’s the thing – you absolutely DO NOT want to try and fight Frodo or Pippin because they are going to be protected by the rest of the Fellowship, which basically exists to stop asshole Big People from picking on the hobbits. Folk might talk a big game but when the chips are down, you are not going to lay a single hand on any of the hobbits. Either you’ll find yourself immediately fighting all four of them or else you’ll move to land your first hit and suddenly Aragorn will side-tackle you into the trees. And he probably hits like a freight train tbh.
So here’s what you do:
You fight Legolas.
The thing about fist-fighting Legolas of course is that you will lose. This is not a fight you’re gonna win no matter what. But Legolas has his standing competition with Gimli, so once the challenge is issued, he’s not gonna let anyone else step in and fight you either. No one is liable to volunteer on his behalf, either, so you will only end up fighting the one member of the fellowship. If you are lucky he might also take his shirt off. Bonus!
Anyway.
Legolas will mop the floor with you, but he’s also already convinced you’re weaker than him anyway because you’re not an elf, so he’s gonna go kind of easy on you. And when you lose he will be all snide and superior about it, which means everyone in the fellowship is gonna sympathize with you, and Gimli will probably challenge him on your behalf afterwards, but here’s the key thing:
You will have lost a fist-fight to an immortal warrior prince.
That’s a way better loss to cop to than that time you tried to fistfight a pudgy gentlehobbit and got beaten to the point of unconsciousness by his gardener, yeah?
okay so tolkien tumblr is fast becoming my fave tumblr community thank you thank you all you are the true fellowship here.
Is there a name for someone whose religious beliefs amount to “there is a god but they are dead. like, literally dead, no longer in existence”?
My roommate just described adderall as an upper and not as an adhd med while on the phone with someone and like…
Listen. I’m not about to shame every drug user in the world I’ve toked that good herb I come from a family of addicts I get it
But for the love of good stay away from adhd meds.
You know what happens when adderall becomes the big party drug? The drug students without adhd abuse to get their homework done? It makes it harder for people with adhd to get the prescription
I was once denied my meds because I looked like a suspicious drug using kid. Meds I needed to keep my life together!! I’m unmedicated right now because of financial reasons and let me tell you it sucks I wake up way too late, I forget things, my moods are all out of whack, I cant focus, I have trouble socializing, my grades have gone down.
When you abuse ritalin and adderall you raise the price and the suspicion of doctors and pharmacists that people with adhd who need their meds might actually be drug seekers and its UNFAIR that you guys are taking the meds that just barely even me out and becoming super processing machines getting your shit done ultra fast while I take the punishment.
Find a different drug I dont care what at this point, but stop doing stuff that gets people with adhd glared at in the pharmacy line needing 3 kinds of ID just to pick up their script.
I forgot to finish this story, anyways I have food alarms set throughout the day to remind me to eat. My alarm is the exact same as my ringtone, so when my mom called me earlier instead of answering my mom I went to the kitchen and made myself a sandwich.
The practical side of me suggests changing your ringtone. The less practical side of me is highly amused.
I’m glad you enjoy the fantasy biology series! It’s certainly grown a lot these last few years.
Currently each topic is chosen by my Patreon supporters. I’ll keep sea serpents in mind one day for the future, but my Patrons get to choose which direction that series heads in.
For whoever asked this: look up oarfish. They are essentially sea serpents.
Please please please keep an eye on your pokeball amount. The game automatically switches to the next available pokeball type once you’ve run out and the game does not warn you if your last ball is the Master Ball.
I just watched a streamer who hasn’t saved in forever accidentally catch a tentacool with his Master Ball because he didn’t realize he ran out of every other type. Please save often and keep an eye on how many pokeballs you have.
I thought i uploaded these pics but i couldnt find them, but bloody hell are these guys fun to watch at night, so active as they wander about actively hunting crickets.
The butterflies love this Siam Weed bush.
The biggest ones are the migrating monarchs. The slightly smaller ones are queens who mimic the monarchs. The little brown and orange ones are snouts, who are roaming through the area because somewhere got too crowded and they’re looking for new spaces. There’s also a painted lady and a red admiral in there somewhere.
[description: a video moving back and forth over a large patch of a bush with small, blue, pom-pom like bunches of flowers, occasionally zooming in. At least 20 butterflies of varying types are fluttering about and landing on the flowers. Someone in the background is sarcastically pointing out that the butterflies might like this bush.]
BettSplendens Tumblr Evac 