Can I watch a great film knowing the actresses in it were terrorized and mistreated the entire time? Can I watch a football game knowing that the players are getting brain injuries right before my eyes? Can I listen to my favorite albums anymore knowing that the singers were all beating their wives in between studio sessions? Can I eat at the new fancy taco place knowing when the building that used to be there got bulldozed eight families got kicked out of their homes so they could be replaced with condos and a chain restaurant? Can I wear the affordable clothes I bought downtown that were probably assembled in a sweatshop with child labor? Can I eat quinoa?
Can I eat this burger? Can I drink this bottled water? Can I buy a car and drive to work because I’m sick of taking an hour each way on the subway? Whose bones do I stand on? Whose bones am I standing on right now?
On one hand, it’s a privilege to be able to choose to acknowledge these horrors or not–we’re going to acknowledge that privilege. On the other hand, I once attended a lecture by the explorerer-conservationist Jacques-Yves Cousteau’s daughter and son and they had a lot of opinions about what we could do to help the environment and the ocean and I talked about how in my country, we have to drink bottled water, because it’s a desert and there’s only salt water all around, but we’re contributing to pollution and all of these things…
And she looked at me and told me not to fall into the trap of “activist guilt.” I couldn’t remember the exact words, but, it was the first time I’d heard the term and it took a weight off my shoulders.
We do what we can. It’s so much better than giving up entirely or not doing anything at all because we can’t do it perfectly. It doesn’t benefit anyone in the end if we just sit around feeling guilty about every little thing in life. I’d just joined tumblr back then (haha, so like, eight or nine years ago at this point?), I was being exposed to way more than I’d ever been before (I was previously just into feminism and animal rights/wildlife conservation/environmentalism since I was a kid), and it was weighing on me.
As long as humans are humans and living flawed lives, many consumed by greed, there will not be anything in this world untouched by evil.
I usually avoid stuff that says it was made in China or other cheap looking knockoffs, out of fear of them being made in sweatshops (now, I know even a lot of big brands use those…), it’s exhausting. Then, I read something about how people who actually lived and worked in those would still buy this cheap stuff and how this shocked the foreigner reporting on it, but they just looked confused like, it’s what they can afford and them avoiding consuming it isn’t going to change the whole system from the ground-up.
… it went on about how “money talks” and choosing where to put your money still feeds the whole capitalist system and is nearly a way of comforting yourself, but you not buying doesn’t mean everyone else isn’t. What needs to be tackled is at a much higher level than any of us can reach.
Of course, I’d still, given the choice, give my money to companies I agree with and I’ll boycott what I know to support awful stuff, but I also feel no superiority over this and know now it’s not as black and white or easy as I thought it was.
This is the same reason that moral purity “you can’t enjoy [x] because it’s Problematic ™” is such nonsense, because nothing is pure. There’s something bad about everything if you dig deep enough. As long as we lived in flawed human societies we’ve got to make the best of what they offer us. If you have the choice and means, please, do support those who do good, but also, don’t beat yourself up over not living up to an unattainable ideal.
No one can. You’ll just make yourself so miserable, you either burn up and stop fighting entirely or you’ll make yourself a non-productive, depressed heap just out of a bleeding heart left unchecked. You can’t make a change to this world if you refuse to engage in it.
Look at all these purples. No two are the same, even the similar ones are a little different from each other. That’s far more realistic then painting everyone with the same brush. You don’t gotta be the “darkest purple” to be a “”better”” asexual. Just be you, and you’re doing it right. There’s no hierarchy, no exact shade you have to match. All parts of the ace-spectrum are good. I’m happy you are here with all the complex details that make you you. – Rose
This is seriously the most awe-inspiring, positive and down right brilliant answer to an ask I’ve ever seen. Its so simple yet profound. So inclusive whilst diverse.
Old carpet or carpet samples stapled/nailed to scrap lumber. All you need is the ingredients, a hammer, some nails, and enough skill to put a nail in all the way. That or one of those lumber-grade staplers.
i’ve personally known people who have chosen names similar to their given name. like. on one hand ppl like that exist and they’re well and truly valid for choosing to stick with that kinda name because they all have like. specific reasons for it
and if a trans person wanted to write a character like that, i would trust them, legitimately, to do a good enough job
that being said, there are some things cis people (again, confirmed, absolutely not questioning gender cis people) will fundamentally not get. they will without a doubt do it wrong
so please, cis people, i am on my hands and knees begging, do not make your trans characters have alternate versions of their deadname.
on a lighter note. one thing i think cis ppl could tackle okay in writing trans characters is the whole finding a name process. here’s somewhat of a secret, it’s fun. well kinda. it’s very exciting. it can be uncomfortable! it can take a few tries to find the right one, it’s like, yanno it’s like shopping for something but you have no budget and a very very large stock to choose from
some fun name choosing details y’all can feel free to sprinkle in:
-asking friends what they’d call you/what name you look like, given they know what gender you’re aiming for (usually a no but fun/interesting regardless)
-standing in front of a mirror, calling yourself by different names (feels weird, sometimes you can hit something though)
-asking other ppl to call you by a name you’ve settled on, and the first initial feelings from that (won’t always be a hit)
yooo everybody. my mom and i were goofing around and found this seriously FUCKED UP site. all your information, (phone number, nam, address even) is available for 2.99. like everything. please watch this video on how to remove it. (im not sure if it’s there for minors, but if you’ve ever owned/rented a house you’re definitely there. it’s worth checking it out to make sure.)
also, if you’ve lived in more than one place/state it has you multiple times, remove all of your profile things. (it had my mom 4 times, all over our state. even from when she lived in a house 9 years ago.)
psa over.
SIGNAL BOOST THIS SHIT
YES THERE ARE MINORS ON HERE ALSO I JUST CHECKED ME AND IT HAS MY ~PERSONAL~ INFO ON THERE
This is very concerning. I just spent the last ten minutes removing my entire family (including my 14-year-old sister) from the site.
Cool Mom Tech has a guide on how to take your information off the site if for some reason you can’t watch the above video.
Just to inform everyone, it’s American only, but it’s real. I’ve found 3 of my friends already with this sight and the only reason I knew it was them was because I happen to have their address. PLEASE CONFIRM IF YOU ARE ON THIS SITE AND IF YOU ARE, REMOVE YOURSELF. NOW.
I’m screaming internally because I just searched up a handful of my friends who live in America.. and found every single one of them without fail. This is scary.
For my American followers
This is creepy as hell and completely legit. Please take the time to remove yourself from this list.
I just googled it and yeah. Now I can see a real meaning behind the saying ‘don’t give out personal info on the internet’..though in these times it’s difficult not to
THIS IS SCARY SHIT. This could be how my ex has been getting my information for a long time… ITS DANGEROUS. I JUST CHECKED IT OUT AND ITS REAL. IM ON THERE, MY FAMILY IS ON THERE. THIS IS NOT OKAY.
I GIVE ZERO SHITS IF YOU AREN’T FROM AMERICA YOU ARE FUCKING SIGNAL BOOSTING THIS THIS IS SO IMPORTANT THIS IS HOW STALKERS OPERATE OH MY GOD SIGNAL BOOST
Abstergo is getting less and less subtle by the day damn
(I literally only bought this month’s Lala for Natsume, but this panel of Kotarou from Gakuen Babysitters digging up a sweet potato cured my depression cleared my skin and deposited money into my bank account—)