horreurscopes:

horreurscopes:

women refusing to wear anything but shoes that are comfortable and practical  is a form of revolution tbh

when my parents made me go to their cultish christian group, i wore high heels –medium height, or close-toed stilettos if everything else about my outfit was sufficiently modest–  three times a week for two hours. by the end of the night my feet were two grossly swollen flipper shaped bruises.

when i left my parent’s house i regretted losing practice. i wobble on high heels, balanceless, like i have an ear infection. fifteen minutes in the pain is so present that going out anywhere loses all its charm. they hurt walking on sidewalks and asphalt and cobblestones, they hurt less on hardwood floors, carpets are best because they muffle the sting. 

i google “how to wear high heels.”

six hundred ninety six million results advice against taking them off when you sit down because your feet will swell up and they will hurt more when you inevitably have to strap them to your feet again. bustle says take small steps. stylecaster (How to Wear High Heels Without Pain: 8 Expert Tips That Work!) tells me to take breaks from walking. fashionmagazine says pop two painkillers before putting on the shoes. i have a pair of four inch chunky heels (start up heels, the sooner the better).  i haven’t worn them once but i don’t sell them because maybe one day there’ll be an occasion that is worth being in pain for.

i think about ballerina feet. i think about the tape and gels sold in stores next to bra straps and sewing kits to make the torture more bearable. i think about how women take pride in taking the pain without flinching, how there’s high heel races, how it’s not impressive that female celebrities do entire, hours long choreographies in high heels, it’s just required. i want to be beyonce’s back-up dancers, doing backflips on ten inch needles. 

it’s impressive, the same way learning to write with your right hand because in Catholic school they tied your left hand behind your back is impressive. you stop a woman from running by taking away her mobility and on top you tell her it’s beautiful.