thebibliosphere:

stealthflower:

thebibliosphere:

You know those fancy vampire fangs that mold to your teeth? Yea, I just realized I can’t ever wear them again because they’re not supposed to be worn over dental work. Which, I’m sure someone with your average filling might be able to get away with, but given the majority of my teeth are held together with dental cement and hope, I don’t think I’d like to risk it.

Tragic.

I’ll just have to be like the gammy old vampire with the awful dentures that they take in and out between meals.

You really only need the fangs to pierce the skin, anyway, so just get a handheld  set and annoy babyvamps by clacking them in your fingers like sharpened castanets.

I like it when you tap into the exact aesthetic chaos of my brain I really do, because that was the exact thought I was consoling myself with haha.

If you wanna be more accurate to how vampire bats (i.e. the only known vertebrate that’s exclusively vampiric) get a meal, you need, like, a nasty sharpened spoon thing to scoop a chunk of meat out.