tropicalhomestead:

flawsinthisworld:

tropicalhomestead:

1. Anything the government says is propaganda

2. 99% of vegetables taste better roasted

You spelled boiled wrong

My apologies:

Anything the government says is boiled

seananmcguire:

No one knows, and no one really wants to think about it too hard.

Tiny esophaguses leading down into gorgon’s stomach, shared blood supply to all the snakes?

unpretty:

unpretty:

unpretty:

the older i get the weirder it is that not a single p.e. teacher in my entire school career was able to recognize the difference between “a child who doesn’t get enough exercise” and “a child with serious health problems impeding their ability to exercise in this particular way”

you know what else is weird? we had to do that fitness test every year but like… we never actually… learned how to do the things they tested us on…

like, now that i am an adult i have learned how to build up my strength so i can do pushups, but that seems like something they could have taught us? in school? in the class where they tested our ability to pushups? they never taught us how to work our way up to actually doing a chin-up, or whatever. even if i had just been “out-of-shape” (as a CHILD), nothing they did would have solved that problem. i did not learn how to exercise in a functional way until i was out of school and teaching myself, so i’m not sure what those p.e. classes were even intended to accomplish, really.

people are adding a lot of horror stories to this post that are really similar to mine (exercise-induced asthma, running the mile every friday, coughing nonstop for hours afterward and never actually getting any faster or building up any endurance, fainting at least once and not even getting sent to the nurse) but

to add something to the “really obvious shit any idiot could have told me” list

they taught us that the average walking speed should be 3mph, and i consistently tried on treadmills to walk at 3mph, and that always seemed really fucking fast to me and i never understood why

i’m 5′2″

i was in my twenties before i realized that i cannot go that fast because i have short fucking legs

why did grown-ass adults with eyes try to teach my short ass that i should be able to walk an easy mile in 20 minutes

drferox:

I also prefer to not put my fingers near a large, intelligent, tie-dye chicken with bolt cutters for a face unless I know for sure it is chill.

Alright, but I read “prevet” and thought you’d misspelled “pervert”, and I was very, very confused and slightly concerned.