yungmethuselah:

*Abusive parent voice* Here is my memoir about my abnormal child, who was a mistake that nearly ruined our family, yet also stands to teach us valuable lessons about ourselves. Read on to discover a heartwarming tale of my own Heroic Martyrdom as an underappreciated parent-victim of a thing that shouldn’t’ve been born, its zany antics, its even zanier thoughts and emotions as deduced by me through a combination of projection and convenience, and what finally made me realize it$ exi$tence wa$n’t wholly devoid of value!