felixves:

I do this thing where if i have to go to a family event where I will be expected to be a girl I pretend I am a SPY and I am IN DISGUISE AS A TEEN GIRL and my mission is to EXTRACT INFORMATION FROM MY GRANDPARENTS without giving away my real identity. works every time.

• your dress and makeup is now a DISGUISE
• your ‘birth name’ is now an ALIAS
• getting told by your parents to be nice and not yell at anyone being racist is MISSION BRIEFING
• your entire extended family are now FOREIGN DIGNITARIES and you gotta make it thru the evening without being discovered as a RADICAL SPY
• carrying a small water pistol and one of those fake-lipstick pens in your purse helps to get in the zone. the best part of being a spy is the nifty gadgets everyone knows that.
• BONUS if you have to bring a friend of another gender with you to pretend to be your boyfriend. you are both PARTNER SPIES and one of you has to be the cranky but soft-hearted veteran and the other has to be the endearingly-assholeish rookie.