thoodleoo:

thoodleoo:

concept: a podcast about an ancient greek, an egyptian, and a norseman who are bffs and argue about whose mythology is the least fucked up

norseman: i mean i think we can all agree here that really the greeks are the worst
egyptian: that’s a pretty good point
greek: what? fuck you guys, that’s…look, the norse can’t talk
norseman: ‘oh here’s our king of the gods zeus, he turned into a swan to bang a chick’
egyptian: *helpless giggling*
greek: excuse me? excuse me?? do NOT get me started on loki. y’know, the dude who turned into a horse so he could fuck a horse and then GAVE BIRTH to a horse with EIGHT LEGS
norseman: now hang on, eight legs is completely reasonable compared to those, those, what, the hecatoncheires? the dudes with a hundred fuckin hands?
greek: YEAH BUT ZEUS DIDN’T GIVE BIRTH TO THEM
egyptian: ahahaha keep going guys, i’m taking bets in my groupchat over who’s gonna win the inevitable fistfight
greek: yeah laugh it up hatshepsut, at least zeus didn’t become king by jizzing in someone’s salad