polyamorousmisanthrope:

lionbrandyarn:

Shh…don’t tell!

*sighs*

If you’re in a relationship where you’re not free to enjoy your hobby, you need another relationship. 

I’m not all that much of a yarn-fondler, but i think it’s certainly a valid subset of fiber arts.  But I one hauled out every piece of my stash when my husband thought that my entire yarn stash was storied in a single large wicker basket.  (No. Not even close. I knit a LOT and have about a year’s worth of yarn at any one time).

Still, when I got it out and covered a double bed with it, my husband’s response was an anxious, “Honey, you know it’s okay to buy as much yarn as you want, right?”  (We have friends with much larger stashes).

When I buy yarn, I feel zero guilt about it, because it’s not like I’m spending my kid’s tuition money to get it.  When my husband wants the really good markers for his art, we make room in the budget for it.

We don’t hide our hobby expenditures from each other because we know perfectly well we’re not going to put the other in financial jeopardy for our hobbies.  If you’re lying to your partner about expenditures, there IS a problem – either your self-control or the fact that your partner is exerting inappropriate control over you.* Either way, it ain’t really a joke.

* If pleasure expenditure isn’t equitable, there’s a problem.