some followers may already know this about me but one of my favorite plants is a cool neato technical wildflower called the Eastern Skunk Cabbage.
this is what a blooming Eastern Skunk Cabbage looks like:
these plants are so comically disgusting like
-they smell like rotting flesh if you accidentally crush the outer part of the flower
-they like to live in mud and bogs and prefer environments where they can have cold running water over their roots at all times
-they’re pollinated by flies and beetles
-they bloom in really late winter and casually heat themselves up and just burn through the snow. like they just casually do that for two weeks out of the year
-these bois are not annuals. no. these bois are deep rooted and there to stay bitch. like if you cut their main tuber in half, you can see them already starting growth for the outer part of their flower for blooms up to ten years in the future.
-i did an entire research project on them and their heating mechanisms because theyre a really good example of the protein im interested in, the Alternative Oxidase Protein
-these bois actually measure the exact outside temperature and adjust their inner bloom temperature to keep it perfectly steady. we dont know how it does this yet, we just know that the measuring mechanism is in the outer part of the flower.
-they’re native flowers in the midwest and up through canada
A list of ways Junkrat has tried to steal one of my orbs:
While meditating by the cliffs this morning, he crept up behind me and took an orb from its orbit. I let him get nearly back to the base before I recalled it.
Unfortunately, he did not manage to let go of the orb in time, so I ended up accidentally dislocating his shoulder. He became Dr. Ziegler and I’s first patient for the day. In addition to the dislocated shoulder, we found:
1 small cut on his chin
3 large abrasions on his hip, shoulder, and knee (from being dragged five feet across the ground before he finally clued in and let go of the orb)
1 mysterious bruise
8 miscellaneous burns
He tried to snatch an orb on his way out, but this time, I stared him down until he released it.
While I was preparing Dr. Ziegler’s lunch, Junkrat tried to pick-pocket an orb while walking past. I waited until I was leaving the kitchen before I recalled it, the orb rocketting out of his pocket and toppling him over in his chair.
After he picked himself up, he tried a dash and grab, but tripped over his own bootlaces before he made it three steps.
Let it never be said that Junkrat is not clever: just around 3pm, he realized that if he draped himself across my back and distracted me with cute animal pictures, I would be completely vulnerable.
He very nearly got away with it, but Dr. Ziegler pointed out that how odd it was for Junkrat to behave that way towards me. I had to chase him all the way to the engineering workshop, and tackled him through the doorway, but I was able to successfully retrieve my orb.
Junkrat had to return to the infirmary because he cracked his head rather hard and I worried about a concussion. His head was fine, but we found more scrapes, bruises, and minor burns.
Dinner arrives. Junkrat tries to replace an orb with an apple, but Hana sees him. Soon, everyone is sticking random objects into my orbit. This lasts past dinner and continues until Torbjorn storms in demanding to know where his scrap metal is. It is in my orbit, along with:
several spoons
a coffee mug
the apple
a bag of D.Ritos
Snowball
Genji’s faceplate and several shurikens
an entire case (unopened) case of Mt. Dew
five grenades
twelve rainbow colored gel pens
a cellular phone
Hanzo’s hair ribbon
Hanzo’s arrows and the quiver (separate)
four Pachimari keychains
and one very confused and unhappy Ganymede
Reinhardt grabbed Torbjorn and tried to add him to the cloud, but I told him that it was either one angry dwarf, or many small objects, but not both.
They chose one angry dwarf.
I am so sorry, Torbjorn. I should not have laughed, but I did.
Junkrat tried to take an orb while Torbjorn was floating in angry circles around me, but Lena caught him and made him give it back.
There is still time tonight that he might yet try again, but it is getting later, and there are now several people in the room with me, so hopefully he will give it a rest. He looks very absorbed in a Rubik’s cube at the moment.
STOP CALLING ME OUT YA TOSSER!
An’ GIMME BACK ME BABIES!
You can come fetch your grenades from the infirmary at any time, I am not holding them hostage. But you left them behind when everyone else was retrieving their things from orbit, and I did not feel it was safe to leave them lying around. All you must do is say please and thank you, and they will once again be returned to your loving care.
Also, no. I will never stop calling out your amusing hijinks.
you see shit like this and just realize like… no wonder the entire civilized world believed in magic and shit so strongly. im spiritual myself but if you didnt have the scientific framework, the concept of magic is equally explanatory… the earth shows us crazy shit each and every day
As I get older I’m finding that a lot of the “intellectuals” I used to admire are actually just condescending and pretentious. And also realizing how much more important it is to be present, considerate, and empathetic because nobody really knows what they’re talking about and anyone who claims to know everything about anything is feeding you bs.
“When I was young, I admired clever people. Now that I am old, I admire kind people.”
– Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel
I am also realizing that actual intellectuals make their subjects easy to understand, and faux intelectuals will attempt to baffle.
“If you can’t explain it to a six year old, you don’t understand it yourself.”
those little things on ur nose aren’t blackheads, don’t try and get rid of them they’re sebaceous filaments and they’re permanent and literally everyone has them
every girl has that little pouch of fat on her lower tummy, despite what magazines try n show u, you have important organs there that need to be protected don’t try and get rid of ur pouch
ur body is smarter than u think and it knows what to do when u eat more than normal. one bad day, or even week, of eating poorly isn’t gonna ruin anything at all I pinky promise
if u think u look good up until u try taking a selfie, it’s not ur fault – our faces are asymmetrical and when u see ur face flipped it will look unnatural to u, since u don’t see it that way when u look in the mirror. to everyone else it looks perfectly fine
no one’s stomach looks the same at 8pm as it does at 8am. no one has a chiseled six pack after a day of eating, not even the super fit people u see on tumblr, because ur stomach naturally expands after eating and expecting to have a flat tummy before bed is very unrealistic
no one notices if the bags under ur eyes are bad today. no one pays attention to the bump in ur nose or the zit on ur chin or the piece of hair that u missed when u were straightening. literally no one notices these things except you so stop worrying about it ur gonna be fine
Autistic Person: “To decide who to hire, the applicants should try out for the job the same way a student in school would try out for a varsity sport. They should be given tests that directly measure their ability to perform the job. Whoever performs best on the tests will get the job.”
Allistic Person: “To decide who to hire, the applicants should be forced to have a conversation with me. The conversation will involve me asking vague questions like ‘tell me about yourself’. The questions I ask will be so hard to answer that people will literally pay someone to give them tips on how to answer them. I’ll also be testing things like body language and eye contact, which tell me jack shit about their ability to actually perform the job. But it’s okay, because I have psychic abilities that tell me who to hire within one minute of meeting them.”
Society: “I think we’ll go with the allistic person’s idea.”
The Stooges were making a film/short/whatever and one scene was giving Curly a lot of trouble. He kept blowing his line. They did take after take after take and he got more and more frustrated, because he couldn’t get it right.
One last take, he screwed it up, threw himself on the floor in frustration and started spinning himself like that going “woowoowoowoowoo.” It was pure rage and frustration.
Everyone present fell to the floor laughing, so they started using that in their films.
BettSplendens Tumblr Evac 