lemme tell you i am so fucking tired of angsty vampires. its enough.
give me a newly-turned twenty-something vampire who hears about their newfound immortality and is like “thank god,” then proceeds to invest in some promising startups and fucks off to take a nap for two decades
give me a vampire thats only the tiniest bit phased at the blood diet because “eh, i tried paleo a while back and it was just as weird”
give me a vampire with self image issues who never has to avoid mirrors again because – bingo – no reflection
give me a genderqueer vampire who finally has an answer when someone asks their gender. “are you a boy or a girl?” “i am a vampire.” “but whats in your pants?” “fangs.”
best of all, give me a vampire chick who is so stoked about being nocturnal because she’s never been able to walk alone after dark before and it’s nice to be able to walk her friends home and know theyre all safe with her
@thebibliosphere I know none of this is directly related so why am I still so reminded of Hunger Pangs…
Probably because this is how I write my vampires. I mean Vlad is still an angsty soul but that’s because he has mental health issues he’s been dealing with for 400 years, not because he’s a vampire. Also napping for two decades. That is him.
Like seriously, why isn’t pole dancing an olympic sport? This is freakin gymnastics. This is strength and skill. This is not sexual whatsoever. Why does pole dancing have to be so stigmatised as a sexual thing that only strippers do? I have great respect for all people who can pull this off. This is art and beauty right here.
HEY FUN FACT: pole dancing is known as something strippers do because strippers invented it. And that’s okay! It’s okay to have respect for strippers and the hard work they put into what they do! Let’s stop trying to take the stripper part out of pole dancing so upperclass white girls can do it without being ~stigmatized~ because god forbid women be sexual.
Seriously, ballet was originally invented by prostitutes, and now look, it’s a fine art with no sexual stigma. Respect art in whatever form it comes.
pole dancing is beautiful.
I have taken pole dancing classes before. THE PEOPLE THAT DO THIS WITH THAT AMOUNT OF SKILL ARE BADASS!
Customer (calling from Ireland): “Yes hello, I would like to -”
Sheep in the background: *gentle baa*
Customer: “Uh, sorry, what I want to do is -”
Sheep: *slightly more insistent baa*
Customer: “No, not now! -cough- Excuse me. I have a reservation and -”
Sheep: *VERY LOUD ACCUSATORY BAA*
Customer:“Arnulf! Please be quiet, I am on the phone! … Sorry, I sincerely apologize on behalf of Arnulf.”
me: “I love and forgive him.”
Customer: “Don’t, he doesn’t deserve it. Anyway, I’m calling about -”
Arnulf: *small, very self-satisfied baa*
I once took my kids to a local farm and we found a lil goat with its horns stuck in a fence, just sitting there kinda mournfully on the grass. We tried to help it get free but it was stuck tight. We petted it for a while and fed it some grass (as it had lawnmowered a circle around itself as far as it could reach), and then went back to the ticket office to tell them it needed help, but before I’d said more than: “There’s a goat-” the guy cut me off with a weary wave and said, “Yeah, we know. Stuck in the fence. That’s Brenda. She can get herself out whenever she wants. She just likes the attention.”
“actually seat belts will HURT you if they stop you in an accident and they’re UNCOMFORTABLE” like the same way parachute packs are uncomfortable for sky divers and probably give a good tug when they released and catch air? better not wear those either lol
“if you have a bit of stress then you can use this, but if you have a lot of stress use this one”
oh god I just lost it laughing
I love this
Birds!
I don’t know what kind they are. The mother is a larger songbird-frame bird, with a grey back and a dull yellow belly. She flies kind of oddly, with her wings sort of cupped and fluttering. I’ve seen more birds like her, and they all fly like that. They’re really agile and can hover well, but they aren’t fast across open air. I can’t remember ever seeing them before, and I would remember that flight pattern, but they’re all over the place, always in pairs, this year.
The nest was clinging to the side of the tree. You can see a lot of webbing in the photo- I think that’s either webworm (tent caterpillar) webbing or spider webbing, and it was worked all into the nest. I’d imagine “builds its nest out of webbing and sticks it to a tree trunk” is a pretty distinctive bird thing.
@lookatthisbabybird and general @birdblr, anyone wanna take a stab at IDing? Googling and those “find that bird” websites haven’t gotten me anywhere so far. I’m in Central Texas, and sometimes we get birds that are supposed to only live in Mexico, so it could be some of them came up from there.
BettSplendens Tumblr Evac 